Cheney's memoir: A double scoop of self-serve
Dick is ticked at Colin,
Dick is ticked at Condi, too,
Dick is ticked at Dubya—
There's ev'ry chance he's ticked at you!
Dick is tops at settling scores,
Dick preferred a few more wars,
Dick is hot to sell some books,
Doesn't care how crass it looks.
Dick is ticked at Tenet,
Dick is ticked at Paul O'Neill,
Dick is ticked at Media—
His dial is set to "Full Conceal."
Dick will not apologize,
Dick would rather patronize,
Dick's so quick to condescend,
Dick's still playing "Let's Pretend."
Dick is ticked for Scooter,
(Bush just hung him out to dry!)
Dick is ticked for Rummy,
(It's not his fault Iraq's awry!)
"Further!" is how far he'd go—
Dick defends Guantanamo,
"Harder!" cries our Torture Lord—
Dick defends the waterboard.
Dick is ticked from habit,
Dick is ticked to goose his sales,
Dick is ticked for payback,
He's mostly ticked to hide Big Fails.
Dick sees things in black and white,
Dick, says Dick, was always right,
No forgives, and no forgets—
Dick is Dick, with no regrets.
Rick Horowitz is a syndicated columnist. You can write to him at firstname.lastname@example.org.