Finally, nightmare comes to end
Had this weird dream the other night that Brett Favre played for the New York Jets last season.
My weird dreams usually involve an army of Wayne Newtons dressed as Elvis giving chase with cleavers through the Tokyo fish market.
But, come on. Brett Favre in New York? That’s flirting with dangerously weird.
We all know Favre has been sidekicking with homeboy Frank Caliendo on NFC Sundays since his teary goodbye from the Packers last March. And doing more jeans commercials with Junior and Bubba and the boys, anything for Deanna to get him out of the house every now and then.
Man, did he look comfortable in retirement or what? Once he got over the emotion of the Packers putting No. 4 up there beside Bart and Reggie and the rest of them during halftime of the Monday night opener against the Vikings, it was good to see him back for the occasional game. Remember how he actually went out of his way to console Aaron Rodgers after the Carolina comeback? That’s what you’d call cementing a legacy.
Just imagine if he’d gone to New York. Try picturing the tumultuous off-season it would’ve caused the Packers. Think about the distractions during training camp, the fracture it would’ve caused among fans choosing sides between iconic franchise and iconic player. No way could you have imagined that, not after Favre said he was done. And done as a Packer, forever and ever, amen.
What a ridiculous dream. Favre sooner would’ve gone to the hated rival in Minnesota than New York, and you know he’d rather give up his ball cap and flip-flops than even think about playing for the Vikings.
And that was the really odd part about the dream. In it, Favre actually leveraged a trade after—get this—un-retiring!
Now, a guy’s got the right to change his mind and play until somebody forcibly yanks the jersey from the shoulder pads, but New York? Had the Packers gone and done something as silly as traded him to the Jets, Favre would’ve parked the pickup rather than expose it to the Long Island Freeway.
That’s why it was more of a nightmare than a dream. In New York, they would’ve had to dump Chad Pennington, and, who knows, maybe that’s the kind of guy who could come back and beat you for a playoff spot. And if things went wrong in New York, somebody else, probably the coach, would’ve taken the fall.
And the worst of it for Favre, the New York media would’ve artificially built him up during an unrealistic start, only to knock him down when his 39 years began catching up with him. Imagine the outrage had Favre led the league in interceptions, produced something like an 81 quarterback rating and thrown nine picks in the last five games as the Jets unraveled.
Scarier yet, his own teammates would’ve turned on him. One would’ve said Favre should’ve been benched for further fouling the Meadowlands. Another might’ve suggested for Favre to stay home unless he could fully commit to another season. Imagine that, because there’s no crucifixion like a New York crucifixion.
Happily, it’s unimaginable because Favre never would’ve risked his legacy, not with the Ambassador For Life gig he got along with the keys to the burg when he went out as a Packer.
Good thing it was just a bad dream.
Now let me tell you of another one I had about Favre playing for the Vikings next season.